S. Darko

One of the people who used to live at my apartment has apparently not cancelled his Netflix account.  After leaving Choke on the coffee table for a month, I finally figured out whose it was and returned it, only to get the next was on his list, S. Darko.

I have this to say: One of the worst movies I've ever seen, at least of those connected in any way to a decent movie.  It does not jibe with the Donnie Darko mythology, but they ridiculously use props and imagery from the original in meaningless ways to try to convince you that it does (i.e. the rabbit mask and the weird tube thing coming out of people).  I can only assume that no one who worked on the original film had anything to do with this one, with the possible exception of some socially retarded dweeb they allowed to bring them coffee sometimes (quite possibly the horrible actor who plays Jeremy).  If this goddamn piece of shit weren't so horrible, I'd complain about the fact that about a third of it is just montage to random songs.  And if I were one of the about 5.9 billion people who say the original is their favorite movie, this one would piss me off.  Fortunately for everybody, almost no one even seems to know it exists.

Identity Crisis

I'm having a bit of an identity crisis: I'm not really a hipster, and I'm not really a yuppie, though I share characteristics of both.  Call me, if you will, a yupster.  This happens to be one of those dichotomies that doesn't have much of a place for its hybrids though.  Being some of both seems to make me a complete outsider.  Unless, that is, I'm passing as one or the other in their respective venues.

This dilemma was really brought home to me today, after I ordered a soy cafe au lait at a totally hipster coffee joint.  Now, I prefer coffee shops to have a nice little counter whereat one might dress up one's own coffee to one's preference, with skim or whole milk, half and half or soy milk, plus an assortment of sugars, calorie free sweeteners (preferably including a stevia product, but good luck finding that), and other coffee accoutrements.  In New York though, you never know what they will or won't have, many places not having any counter at all, others sporting only half and half, soy milk, brown sugar and simple syrup, or some other such combination.  At many if not most coffee establishments, you will only get sneers of disdain if you inquire about the availability of any sugar free syrups.  And so, as I walked out of the cafe with my coffee, walked half a block down, stopped on someone's stairs and added a few Splenda packets from the stash I keep in my bag, and tried stirring them with one of those longer, sturdier Splenda packets before abandoning that tactic in favor of using one of the stems of my Ray Bans shades, I realized that I need to find a coffee shop at which I belong.

And the yuppie/hipster dilemma is all the more real and important even than my coffee issues to me at the present, as I have two interviews on Monday morning, one for a salaried corporate job and one for a job at Trader Joe's, two and a half hours apart from each other, between which I am hoping to have time not only for the commuting but also to change from my classy interviewing suit to my upscale casual interviewing outfit.  And I still haven't decided whether or not to slip my lip ring back in between the two interviews.

In other words, who am I?  Where do I belong?  And where do I go from here?

Someone please please please please buy me this

I've been waiting for it for a couples years now, didn't think it'd come so soon!!!

http://store.neurosky.com/

A really cute application of it:
http://www.networkworld.com/slideshows/2010/030910-geeky-items.html?source=NWWNLE_nlt_daily_am_2010-03-10#slide8


Also this:

http://www.brookstone.com/VIDEO-GLASSES-FOR-IPOD-AND-IPHONE-IDESIGN.html




Maybe one of these, just for fun:

http://www.amazon.com/CARD-PIN-HOLE-COLOR-VIDEO-RECORDER/DP/B0039H9LUG/REF=SR_1_1?IE=UTF8&S=TV&QID=1267744996&SR=1-1

Nowism

I StumbledUpon this video of Jim Carrey extolling Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now spirituality.  And he was very sincere about it, it was clearly very meaningful to him and everything, he's kinda tearing up a bit talking about bringing laughter into people's lives.  Then at the end, text comes up encouraging you to go to this Eckhart Tolle TV website, and it gives you a promo code for a free download if you join the site.  So I go there, 'cause this stuff has fascinated me for awhile.  And there's Eckhart Tolle in a video on the front page, and I click on join, and start entering my desired username and password, etc. when I see 89.95!  Whathefuh?!  A spiritual website with pretty heavy duty membership costs, huh?  Jim Carrey's sincerity is starting to look a little bit like Tom Cruise's insanity.  Fuck this.

Haagen Daaz has come out with a new ee cummings approved flavor!

Self Referential Songs

I'm just trying to make a list. Let's see:

-You're so Vain, by Carly Simon - 1972

-Yellow, by Coldplay - 2000

-Sugar We're Going Down, by Fall Out Boy - 2005

Okay, I can't think of any more for now.

Netflix

Oh, life, you clever bastard. Why is it that I want what I can't have - or can't have now anyway - so much more than what I can? I want to see the movies available on Netflix's instant access movies considerably less than those in my queue I have to wait for. I could really want to see a movie, and then all of a sudden it's now available instantly, and suddenly I can't get it up for that movie at all. Sigh...

I'm sure this was on purpose, but still

I had to take a picture. Also, when are Rihanna and Lady Gaga going to do a song together?

I wish I had more money to throw at impressing people with buying electronics when they come out, 'cause I totally would.

Progress and fun! I mean, they finally made the fucking key finder!

Philosophy and Man on Man

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GLAAD and South Park's "The F-Word"

Check out the latest episode of South Park (season 13, episode: "The F-Word") if you've not yet seen it, and then check out one of the various articles on GLAAD's opposition.

"Fag" and "gay" obviously haven't yet been completely divorced from their time as homosexual slurs, but they are certainly transitioning. I'm a lesbian myself, and I try not to use these words, but I find that I have no other word that encompasses this particular meaning I often want to convey, namely, an annoyingly affected douche. (I'm sure there are feminists (I consider myself a feminist, by the way) who would have a problem with me using the word douche this way, but bear with me because I've already gotten too wrapped up in parenthetical statements and tangents, and I'd use the same argument for that word as I'm making here).

Oh people have suggested "ghetto", "retarded" and "lame" as substitutes, but those words offend some people and none of them really encapsulates my intended meaning anyway.

One thing I find interesting about this episode is its exploration of how in modern times with GLAAD and others groups and individuals constantly on the look out for political incorrectness, these kids have to try to actively, consciously evolve the meaning of a word (to the point of legislation) instead of letting the meme evolve more organically. Well these words have started to evolve organically, and I think the South Park people are helping gay people slough off the derogation of these terms onto the annoyingly affected douches of the world.

I also get annoyed when it seems that almost the only thing - besides the monthly donation requests - I hear from GLAAD is them ripping on a Family Guy episode (the satire of which they didn't seem to understand, or else don't care about meaning so much as the opportunity to voice their opinion that someone is oppressing us) and this South Park episode. First of all, if FG and SP can be said to be on our side or not, they're definitely on our side. Secondly, SP especially is always putting itself out on a hugely politically incorrect limb on every subject imaginable, and as a gay person, I can at least say for myself that I in no way want special treatment from them on topics that relate to me.

Further, I would love to annoy Fred Phelps' cronies and their "God Hates Fags" rallies. At the very least they'll have to repaint their signs, perhaps with the more cumbersome "God hates homosexuals", and that'll take a little zing out of their movement since it was partly their use of such a politically incorrect slur coming from a supposed organization of "God" that made them so notable and newsworthy.

And finally, I'm sorry, but even if I didn't have all these other reasons to "side with" SP on this issue, the "bikecurious" joke is comic gold and makes this episode just plain worth it.

...I could go deeper here about how I think Trey and Matt actually implanted, if you will, a clever trap for GLAAD into this episode (into which they obviously fell, considering their antagonism to this episode) that takes their maniacally satiric genius to a whole 'nother level...okay I'll go there. They're saying we're being fags (in the new definition that actually exists in the real world, not the Harley thing) when we sit around and decide we're not getting enough attention and so we should rumble louder for no reason. Well GLAAD's demand for an apology, is just such rumbling...and, yes, it makes them fags.

One bad thing about the internet

There's always a huge possibility that your last words to someone before you or they die will be "brb", "ttyl", or "lol kk, cya l8r" :[

The Office

Some people debate the relative merits of the British versus the American versions of The Office. My issue with watching the British The Office is that even if I only watch half an episode, for the rest of the day I incessantly talk to myself in the accent, syntactical structure, idioms, etc. of the characters in the show.

Has anyone talked about this?

While many straight men have gone along with a metrosexual trend, I've been noticing more and more gay men looking more...straight/masculine? Has anyone written witty articles about this and come up with some catchy term? Well the point is, my gaydar is falling apart.

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, The Movie

This is going to be the worst adaptation ever., with solely B actors, and Tucker Max being played by someone I've never seen before. Until the trailer that is, where he displays the worst acting I've seen since someone made me watch an Amanda Bynes movies. It also is going to just be a clusterfuck of whatever parts of the movie they could squish into one continuous story (as opposed to the memoir filled book). The things they would have had to omit from the book to keep the rating down to an R already mean that the most hilarious anecdotes will be missing. It seriously looks to be on par with American Pie. I'm offended by this way more than anything Tucker Max actually did.

theIHC.com

Red Man Vs. White Man

Isn't it great that what used to take Native Americans 4-6 months to do, traveling through the forest, hunting, starving, etc. we can now all do with a google search and 6 multiple choices questions? That's right, my spirit animal guide is a hawk.

Update: Apparently it might also be an eagle or a bear.

Realization I've made about concerts

I hadn't been to any concerts in my life (except for symphony orchestras in my childhood) until a few months ago and have since been to a handful. Third Eye Blind is one of my favorite bands, so I figured nothing could ruin this experience for me. Well, this is the concert that made me realize I don't want to go to concerts whereat people do not sit in seats. Here's the review I submitted per Ticketmaster's request:

Love this band, hate concerts

Third Eye Blind @ The Palladium Ballroom in Dallas, TX on Mon, Jun 8, 2009

Posted 07/14/2009

by Arielle

Location: Richardson

They were great, though actually it was a bit disillusioning. I guess I still hold artists up on pedestals, a remnant of childhood I suppose. Anyway, almost everyone there, as on this planet, was a douche bag. The whole time had to be spent telling guys with popped collars twig-like girls with too much make up, high heels, and skimpy dressed that just because they moved with confidence didn't mean I would let them push their way ahead of me. I had been waiting in the same, fairly close to the stage area, feet killing me, for 2 hours, while they had showed up late, had a few beers, etc.

Also, the audience's feeble attempts to sing along probably ruined our chances of making it on the B side of the album they were using our concert to try to acquire some tracks for. Great Dallas, effing great.

Favorite moment: When enough of us voted int he song "I Want You" over "How's it Gonna Be", not that the latter isn't great too.

Setlist: Fuck if I remember.

Choconut Bars

This is a recipe my grandma and mom made that they got from a Better Homes and Gardens book. I couldn't find it anywhere on the internet, and it belongs there, so here it is:

Ingredients:
1.5 sticks of butter
1 cup sugar
2 beaten eggs
35 graham square or 2.5 cups of crumbs
2 cups marshmallows
1 tsp vanilla extract
6 oz/1 cup of bittersweet choc. chips
1/4 cup peanut butter

Melt butter in sauce pan on medium heat
Add sugar
Take off heat
Add eggs
Stir in
Put on low heat
Stir constantly (for like 10-15 minutes) until it gets thick and bubbly
Take off heat again
Add the crumblies and marshmallows
Once it's good and mixed in together, pat it down into a pan
Then microwave the choc. and peanut butter
Mix that yummy meltiness and then spread it evenly on the other yummy goodness in the pan
Put that in the fridge for at least an hour, probably two
Try not to eat it all in one place!

I don't think subbing Splenda for any of that sugar works by the way. It'll mess it up for some reason.

This Shit is Getting Out of Hand